Late Night Reflection

Tonight was the opening of the Brighton Uni Graduate Show 2017 which although I’m just a second year, I’ve been asked to be part of. It’s an honour and a wake up call. I’m really proud of the accomplishment, and it’s a reminder I can do things. My self doubt gets to me sometimes, and it’s moments like this that I’ll use against that.

It’s a wake up call because I’ve been slacking a bit lately. There’s reasons for it – mostly my mental health – but there’s also been a lot of procrastination and laziness. This post is not going to be me being hard on myself, because that’s not productive either. What I want it to be is a marker of where I am right now.

Right now I’ve fallen behind a little with my university work. It’s not disastrous, and I can catch up, but I’ve not been giving it 100%. I’ve got a week left before my deadlines, and everything will be in on time, but I know I could have done better and there’s no one to blame but me. I can’t go back and change it, but I want to learn from it. So future Charlie reading this, go do some work.

Blog-wise, this year it has really taken a backseat. I’ve kept up with my monthly updates, and I’m really glad about that as they’re my favourite to look back on. But other than that, it’s been a bit bare. This summer, I want to get back on track.

In my personal life, I’m proud of my progress. I’ve been working on loving myself more and I’ve come a long way from where I was before.  For the most part, I’m better at knowing my worth and standing up for myself.There’s a few issues that I’ve worked through but I’m not sure I want to go into too much detail right now.

While I am generally in a better place mentally that I was, I’m still slacking sometimes. I think I need to spend some time coming up with an action plan for what to do when things aren’t great because I get lost in my head. A better routine to stick to would probably also work wonders.The last month has been better though.

This post has been a bit rambly and I’m not entirely sure what I’m trying to get across, but I think it’s important for me to get it out to have something to look back on. This time next year, it’ll be my show and I want to make the most of it.

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